Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
