Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
