I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I love you. Go after that dick
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
