He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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