i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
