So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
