We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
