at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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