Do vagina's smell?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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