I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
