I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
