pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Randomize