I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
