I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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