You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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