you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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