so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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