All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
