not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
