Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
