a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
