found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Non-Jews are for practice
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
