FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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