I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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