im having a threesome with these popsicles
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize