just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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