Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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