Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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