Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
