spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
