He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
