I can't watch pbs sober anymore
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
