her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
