Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
