So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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