And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
