I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
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