Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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