it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize