i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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