haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
