i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
