...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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