was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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