You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I am one with the molecules
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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