she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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