I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
