It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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