if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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