I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
