So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
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